


Shining through Stormclouds

by RookieReporterZ



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders Has Panic Attacks, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders Needs a Hug, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders is Extra, Cute Ending, Do people even read tags?, Fluff and Humor, Fluffy Ending, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, I started this ages ago, I'm Sorry, Inspired by Fanart, Mild Language, Morality | Patton Sanders is Anxiety | Virgil Sanders' Parent, Panic Attacks, Platonic Relationships, Some Plot, THANK YOU SO MUCH TO CaraIsTrash FOR EDITING!!!, What Have I Done, Writing while on Lockdown, all the feels, but romantic if you squint, https://caffibun.tumblr.com/post/174243067645/tips-for, uuggggghhhhhh, yay!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-26
Updated: 2020-04-19
Packaged: 2021-03-01 01:21:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,846
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23326927
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RookieReporterZ/pseuds/RookieReporterZ
Summary: -It all started with Patton...-Virgil was tired. The anxieties kept coming and there was no way to make them stop. That was until his family came to the rescue. Patton with cuddles and hot chocolate, Logan with calming facts, and Roman with stories beyond Virgil's wildest imagination.The three different methods used to comfort Virgil. Because everyone deserves to be loved, even Anxiety.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil & Creativity | Roman & Logic | Logan & Morality | Patton, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Logic | Logan Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Morality | Patton Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil/Creativity | Roman/Logic | Logan/Morality | Patton
Comments: 26
Kudos: 206





	1. The Dad Method

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by: https://caffibun.tumblr.com/post/174243067645/tips-for

**_Comfort your strange, dark son with all of the cuddles and affection he says he doesn’t need._ **

It all started with Patton.

Virgil was always hiding behind closed doors. That in itself had never been an unusual occurrence. As the anxious side, he was often anxious about everything. 

He wasn’t supposed to stress. Wasn’t supposed to freak out or panic or get nervous about stuff he wasn’t involved in. Unfortunately for Thomas, the personification of his Anxiety was around quite a lot due to his heightened state. And  _ quite _ unfortunately, he just so happened to pass by, overhearing their conversation. 

The incident happened a week ago.

A week ago, he was wide awake. Not tired, just annoyed and mildly agitated. The early hours of the morning was not an opportune hour to be awake. Even in the confines of his room, Virgil was having trouble falling asleep. This, of course, was just related to the fact that he had slept into the late hours of that morning and not at all thanks to the anxious persona contemplating the meaning of life. 

The others, he thought, were going to be asleep anyway. Logan always stuck to rigid sleeping schedules, Patton was the ultimate dad in wanting to go to bed on time and Roman, the ever obnoxious, needed his beauty sleep. Besides, he wasn’t going out to the Mind Palace for very long, just to get a glass of water. Maybe even grab a spare pair of headphones or steal one of the very entertaining novellas that Roman was working on and constantly left strewn around the place. One of the ones that Virgil would never admit to liking of course. 

He had crept out as quietly as he could, trespassing carefully around the rooms of the other sides. It was dark.  _ Not that he was afraid or anything _ , he told himself,  _ just very observant _ . He was observant of most things. Virgil had always hated planes, schedules, public appearances, the dark corner of the internet which contained twenty different ways to bake cookies without burning the house down, watermelon flavoured lollipops, demons and/or ghouls under the bed, the dreaded social interaction, etcetera. Needless to say, he was a-little-over slightly  _ observant _ about the mostly-normal rational fears of a person.

He had clicked the dim light, painting a wave of yellow across the room. The Mind Palace was as empty as he expected it to be this late. At least, that was what he thought until he heard wispy voices coming from the kitchen.

“...nd they’ve done so much for us… know Thomas… social settings and that but...” 

“...but that… him… uncomf… ble...”

The ever paranoid thoughts rushed through as he fought them back. Him, who was him? Was it another side? Were they going to replace him with someone? Someone who could make a difference? Paranoia was the bain of his existence. He moved closer, climbing on to the fridge.

“We never could calculate the outcome, it would be improbable.” There was a shuffling of index cards. “‘Sometimes it be like that’. Was that the correct usage?” If that was probably-Logan, probably-Patton made a squeal of delight.

“You never know, Robert De Zero! We could get Thomas the Prince of his dreams, other than  _ this _ fabulous Prince of his dreams!” He didn’t even need to see to know that was said by Roman, arrogance presumably shining in his most unfortunately perfect smile. Virgil rolled his eyes.

“Okay, so we are going? When are we gonna tell him?”

Who was him? Virgil scrunched up his nose.

“It…” probably-Logan sighed, although it could still be Patton. Virgil was getting confused, especially since they all had the same voice. “It’s probably better if we don’t let him know until just before the party, we can keep him at bay until the last possible second.”

“Isn’t that bad? Not dealing can impact on your other feelings though, right Lo-Lo?” Probably-Patton seemed confused.

Definitely-Roman laughed. “I agree with the Twelfth Doctor here, the longer Virgil is kept out of the situation, the better. Besides, Panic at the Everywhere can freak out as much as he wants once Joan’s party is done.”

Joan’s Party? Why would they go to a party? And why wouldn’t they tell him that they were going? Were they trying to shut him out? The others wanted him gone.

“But-” probably-Patton sighed uncomfortably “- isn’t it wrong to lie to someone? Especially if it is to yourself? Virgil deserves to know as much as we do!”

A warm feeling seemed to well up inside him. Gratitude probably.

“Well, do you think Virgil would want to go? It may be a small gathering, sure, but do you think he would be willing to say yes?” Roman questioned. “Besides, it’s not really lying to him if we, let’s say, withhold information.”

Probably-Logan’s calculating voice cut in, “I believe that is a lie of omission-”

“Shut it!” Pause. “Look, what I’m trying to say, is it really hurting him if we just, don’t mention it until the last possible second? He wouldn’t stress as much, he would still know as much as we do and we all get to go. Doesn’t that sound  _ extravagant _ ?!”

He could hear the hesitation in probably-Patton’s voice, “I-I mean if it helps him to be happier...”

“Perfect! No one needs to mention anything until later! Comprende?”

Roman had pranced off, humming quietly, to go and work on some master project in Thomas’ dreams.

Soon, Virgil was left alone in the dark, on top of the fridge.

They hadn't trusted him, they all thought he wouldn't let them go. 

The worst thing though was that, yes, he probably would have attempted to change their minds. 

He was a terrible friend. At least that was what Joan will think once Anxiety flipped out and inevitably prevented Thomas from going. If he doesn't show up. After all that Joan had done for him, Thomas couldn't even show up and do a little favour for them. 

All because of Virgil.

He had to go to the party. Even if it made him uncomfortable. He was obligated to. For Joan.

That didn't mean that Virgil couldn't try and deny the prospect.

How many people would be there? How many strangers? He sunk under, drowning under his thoughts in the dark.

  
  
  
  


It had been a week since he had come out of his room. Honestly, he was way too over hearing what people said behind his back. Thinking about the possibility of others thinking about him was way better than hearing exactly what they were saying.

So Virgil had stayed in his room, consistently avoiding contact with any of the other sides. He had suffered from so many panic attacks at this point, he had lost count. Roman had often called him ‘Panic! at the everywhere’. Princey had no idea how true that statement was. 

Every now and then, he would hear one of the others outside, talking about ideas for the party. Logan continued on about the rising number of people attending and Patton tried to encourage a conversation with him to let the anxious side know about it all. Once the estimated guests turned into over almost two hundred, Patton finally dropped the idea of telling Virgil earlier.

He hadn’t slept for a week now. A week straight without any type of rest. Not that any part of him was straight anyway, it wasn’t much of a loss. Anyway, by now he was very practised at lying to himself about being healthy or chipper. But… he would have been kidding himself if he said he wasn’t exhausted. Because he was. 

Being dead on his feet didn’t make it any easier to stop coming up with things that would mess up. Or get to sleep.

Which had created the obstacle of the door to his room for the last four days. Hiding him from the rest of the world, blocking him from the mind-numbing fear of reality, disappointment, and social interaction that Thomas would have to face within the next few hours. Not that time mattered anymore.

So he was here. In a soft comfortable hoodie curled into himself like a cowering cat.

He didn’t really know where here was or where he was supposed to be.

In all honesty, it wasn’t about the party anymore. Well, not entirely anyway.

This weekend full of deadlines and schedules had been looming over Thomas for the last month, making Virgil’s anxiety particularly heightened with everything that had happened. Roman’s creativity lacked in diversity because of the outlook that Virgil had proposed in trying new things, making him expressly irritated with Virgil. The lack of productivity continued to irk Logan, making him grumpy, judgemental and overall, in Virgil’s very accurate opinion, idiotic, then causing him to be annoying. At this point, happy, pappy Patton was the only one not being a clueless moron. Needless to say, Thomas was on edge already.

The other sides probably hated him. His controlling ways and fears. His way of messing up everything that was important in Thomas’ life just because there was a chance that he would embarrass himself. Even he hated himself at this point.

Really, the problems of the party had just increased his fear of being perceived as a person. And Virgil’s heightened state had done nothing to accommodate the change of the initial twenty people to two hundred a matter of days before the party.

People were at the cause of most of his breakdowns at the moment. His head seemed to swirl at the thought.

People would be there. Strangers judging him, asking Thomas about his life, silently questioning his existence.

The eyes of strangers would pry into his heart, piercing whatever was left of his sanity. The thought made his skin crawl.

His eyes didn’t work anymore, clouded and blurry. Eyes weren’t supposed to stop working. If he didn’t have eyes, he couldn’t see what he was doing. He couldn’t see how people were perceiving him. He couldn’t see what he was doing  _ wrong _ . What he  _ wasn’t _ doing. Everything that he needed to fix because it was his fault. Everything would have been his fault.

Even thinking about it was unbearable.

He crawled into the wall, squeezing his eyes shut. He just needed to distract himself. He needed sleep. He needed non-stressful situations. He didn’t need anyone.

He needed to not do anything at all. But was that the best thing? Then he wasn’t doing anything and Thomas would never achieve anything in life and then when people in the future would ask him what he does, he would have to reply. Then what would the reply be?

_ I have extreme anxiety so I don’t do anything to contribute to society, I just wallow in self-pity all day. _

All the stares. Judging looks.

_ Too… many… people… _

The door collided with his back as Virgil sank down and curled into a smothered ball. He hadn’t even registered that he was crying until a tear splashed onto his leg, turning the black skinny jeans even darker with his eyeshadow. He supposed that it was fitting, it matched his soul.

Scrubbing at his eyes, not caring whether makeup smudged fingers, he got rid of the tears. He probably looked like a real emo nightmare now. 

Not that he cared.

He didn’t  _ fucking _ care anymore…

Not in the slightest. 

Gasping, Virgil tried to choke back sobs while stifling his crying. Muffling his pathetic whining in the crook of his elbow, he buried his vision into darkness. 

He didn’t need help. No one could hear him anyway.

What if everyone laughed at him? What if no one wanted to talk to him and decided to just ignore him the whole night and he just stood there like a complete maniac? What if he dressed the wrong way? 

What if the other sides never spoke to him again because he made Thomas look like a fool? Why didn’t they tell him in the first place about the party? Did they want to get rid of him? He was just a liability.

Oh god, he was going to throw up. He was going to be sick. Gulping down, he couldn’t get enough air. His throat wouldn’t clear.

Not enough air.

He tried to suck in a mouthful, coughing racked his body when he choked it in.

What was the technique that Logan taught him?

He couldn't remember.

He needed air to remember. To think.

Air.

Tremors racked his body. Shivering underneath his hoodie, he pulled it closer to his shaking limbs.

Sucking in more gulps of air, he started to feel calmer.

In.

Out.

In.

People scorning. People looking.

Another round of quakes racked his aching body. 

His chest seized up.

He was fine.

Totally fine.

He didn't need any help.

It was all good.

He was  _ fine _ .

  
  
  


A staccato knocking at the door pounded through his head, vibrating through his quivering body.

“Virgil! I'm baking cookies! Do you want to come and help?” Pat’s voice sounded slightly muffled by the door but the happy energy still shined through.

He couldn't let Patton see him like this.

”Go away, Pat,” he hoped the moral side couldn't hear the trembling behind his voice. 

Weak. He was weak for letting something like this get to him. It was just a stupid week and a stupid party. Everyone could get through those. If everyone could do it, so could he. He couldn’t let Thomas down. 

He could hear Patton shift closer to the door, ”You okay, kiddo? You sound a little down in the dumps!”

How the hell was he so unbelievably happy?

“Just tired.”

He didn't need any help.

He was  _ fine _ .

Virgil hoped that would be enough to deter him from interacting further. No one wanted to deal with him on a bad day, especially when he was tired. No one really wanted to interact with him on a good day anyway.

Unfortunately, it seemed he had underestimated Patton’s goodness.

“So you don't mind if I come in?”

_ Yes, he did. _

He didn’t want Patton thinking that he couldn’t cope with emotions. 

He didn’t want him thinking he was some worthless fucking idiot.

Stupid. Unwanted.

Pathetic.

He couldn’t take scorn.

Virgil stayed silent.

”Okay, Virge, I'm coming in.”

Crap. Patton could  _ not _ see him like this.

Virgil scrambled back from the door, stumbling to get up and willing tears to stop. In a flying leap that an Olympian would be proud of, he managed to land -or flop- onto the nearby lounge and covered himself with blankets. 

The effect of the jump dizzied him. A washing machine was inside his brain. 

Tumbling thoughts. Anxieties. Worries. Fears. 

The door creaked open. Virgil could barely hear anything over his laboured breathing. 

In.

Out. He just had to keep breathing...

In. Just...

Out. Keep living...

… Patton.

”Oh Kiddo..” he whispered, carting slowly towards the couch. His voice wasn't filled with disdain or even pity as expected. The caramel words floated off his lips with sadness, caring compassion and…

Love.

Patton was concerned because of love. He may even, possibly, love  _ him _ .

That was stupid, he knew that…

But maybe…?

Virgil started sobbing again. Salty tears coated his cheeks with black.

When was the last time someone had shown him love? The dark sides had their own way of showing affection- they didn't. For the first time since running away, he had truly felt  _ wanted _ . Sure, the others had shown him courtesy- well, most of them- but only because he was useful. 

He thought he could deal with being ignored, he could repress, he didn’t have to care about the opinions or insults or anything that was thrown at him by everyone. 

He could be scary.

He was protecting Thomas because that was enough. And if he had to be the villain for everyone to listen, he would. If that meant being hated, he would be that too.

Because everyone was broken, he was the most used to concealing it.

But looking at Patton, solicitude and love touching his eyes and reaching out to help, he melted. And once he had a taste at what it felt like to be loved, his resolve cracked right down the middle.

”Virge,” -Patton approached tenderly and sat on the other end of the couch- ”Can I touch you?”

Head feeling like lead, Virgil nodded.

The moment Patton touched his shoulder, his hand felt electric. Hot and burning. A branding iron searing his skin. Virgil flinched. 

Hurt flooded Patton’s eyes, seedlings of sadness blooming, “Oh, I’m sorry! I should... I shouldn’t have done that!”

Another bite of prickling, glass needles poking at pale skin.

The itching started. Like a thousand tiny insects were eating his skin from underneath. Like ice.

Fabric. He needed his jumper off. 

_ Itchy _ . Off.

His nails tore at his skin, scraping at the usually soft fabric. Grating and scratching, the tingling increasing and his distress increased as well. His skin seared like fire. Hell.

Then, it stopped.

Gingerly, fingers worked on removing the hoodie. Patton looked up at him in worry, the offending item neatly folded on the floor.

”Sorry, it looked like it was bothering you,” that was Patton, always apologising for doing nothing but good.

“‘S fine. ‘M fine,” he mumbled, sinking back under the covers.

He didn't need any help.

He was  _ fine _ .

“No. You’re clearly not fine.” 

And wow, he didn’t know Patton could be so commanding like that, so firm but... empathetic. 

It was then, Virgil knew he wasn’t going to get out of this one. Because, as practised as he was at lying to people, he couldn’t lie to Patton.

No one could lie to Patton.

Patton moved closer, pushing his head closer down towards his.

“Do you want to tell me what happened kiddo?”

“Uh... It’s stupid, you probably won’t want to listen to it. You have more important stuff to do anyway,” the anxious side mumbled. He didn’t want to burden anyone with his problems any more than he wanted to go to the party.

“If it’s bothering you, then it’s never stupid,” Patton stated instantly. “And what could be more important than helping you?”

Virgil almost bit out a venomous ‘literally anything else’ but thought the better of it. Patton looked as though he would physically fight Virgil if he tried to contradict him. He should be able to go through this on his own.

“It’s… It’s just this stupid party. I mean, anyone should be able to deal with it, right? I just...”

Patton’s eyes behind glasses seemed to shatter instantly. He probably looks stupid now. Complaining about a party when everyone else is more stressed and doing important things than he is. He always makes things worse.

Looking at Patton, though, he can't bring himself to regret his choice to tell him. 

“I’m sorry that we didn’t tell you about the party straight up… I- we decided it would- maybe it might have been best if you didn’t stress out about it too much before it happened.” Patton sighed and his face adopted a look so sad he looked like Logan when he found out that Thomas had run out of Crofters.

“I wanted to try and let you know but… clearly we should have told you.”

Virgil forced out a shaky smile.

“I heard you talking about it the other day, Roman seemed as if I would make everything horrible if I knew,” Virgil was surprised to hear that come from his own mouth.

Patton exchanged a pitying look with his hands, “My kiddo was being unfairly judgmental, but his heart is in the right place.”

He reached out and swiped at Virgil's face, catching a few tears that he was too numb to feel.

“Is that all that’s bothering you?” 

Was that all that was bothering him?

“Well, i-it’s just… I don’t know… a lot- a lot of things have been hard to deal… I- I guess deal with lately and...and...”

What was he really afraid of?

“...and…”

Without warning or any kind of a sign, the six hardest words that had ever been spoken slipped through his lips.

“I’m afraid of being left alone...”

He could see Patton staring at him with such intensity he had never seen in the man before. He looked like he wanted to collect all of the shattered pieces of Virgil and squeeze them together until all of the bad feelings would dissipate.

And Virgil broke.

All of his worries and fears and anxieties about the other sides and Thomas gushed out of him, sweeping Patton up in a wave of his tears. He couldn’t stop it. He couldn’t help it, he…

He just let go.

Wrapped in a warm embrace, in the arms of Patton, he felt safe, he felt home.

He felt loved.

Virgil had no idea how long he stayed there for, it could have been weeks for all he knew. He didn’t really care. 

Because he was here, and Patton cared about him. And that was all that mattered. 

  
  
  
  


Patton hummed quietly, carting his hand through Virgil’s hair in an attempt to soothe him.

“Kiddo, you still need to get to sleep.”

An uncommitted grumble from the anxious side answered him. 

“How about I come back here with some hot chocolate? How does that sound?”

Another mumbled intelligible phrase, albeit somewhat happier.

Squirming out of Virgil's surprisingly strong grip, he made his way to the Mind Palace kitchen. The ingredients for cookie making were already out on the bench, unused. That was okay, he could always make cookies with Virgil another time.

Patton smiled to himself as he danced through the motions of making hot chocolate. He made sure to add some extra love to the warming beverage for Virgil. 

His strange, dark son needed some extra love in his life.

**_Outcome: Subject responds well to physical contact, calms down after approximately ten minutes._ **


	2. The Rational Method

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Calm Anxiety down with facts and filter out any cognitive distortions.

**_Calm Anxiety down with facts and filter out any cognitive distortions._ **

Virgil had been dealing better with the stresses of social interaction now that he had Patton to help support him. 

There were still days where it was unbearable and shitty as hell but Patton had helped him to cope and calm down after each attack, resulting in the Dad growing even closer to the anxious being, much to his delight.

Patton would constantly be asking if Virgil wanted to do something with him. Whether it be baking, watching cartoons or even just sitting around the Mind Palace, Virgil slouching on the refrigerator and Patton on the only comfortable seat in the kitchen, he always seemed to be out of his room and stuck to Patton’s side. It also seemed that Patton was taking his responsibility of including Virgil very seriously because he could no longer count the number of words that he had said to each of the other sides without Thomas present on both hands.

He had even been having fewer attacks as of late, and, he thought, that was supposed to be a good thing. Patton was helping him calm down before they even started and he was feeling slightly better than the place that he had been in a few months ago, sobbing against a pathetic wooden door and flinching at even the sparsest touch. 

He  _ was _ doing good in comparison.

So why was he feeling so nervous?

He was just ruining it for himself with a state of unease. What should he be doing?

What  _ wasn’t _ he doing?

Virgil shrugged the anxious thoughts off, dismissing it with a flick of his hair. Patton cared about him and he wasn’t going to let his best friend down with the pondering of pestering thoughts. He couldn’t let Thomas down again, Thomas was being extremely productive now that Virgil had settled down, he didn’t want to be the one that destroyed it for everyone. For now, he was just content with sprawling out in the Mind Palace, making friends with the mild self-hatred that crept up on him occasionally and waiting for Thomas to ask for his help.

“Virgil?” Patton grinned at his position on the ledge of the couch and trotted over. “Hey, Kiddo!”

Virgil greeted him with a two-finger salute, “‘Sup.”

Patton’s teeth glimmered in the limited light that was held in the Mind Palace, Virgil had always liked the dark better than the harshness of reality. They had always held the theory that the Mind Palace would adapt for the people inside its walls, but they hadn’t confirmed anything. As it was, Virgil started to squint as Patton approached him, making the room brighter than what Virgil was used to.

When he was closer, Patton looked slightly concerned, worried even, eyebrow twitching just above his glasses and slight fingers twirling around the rainbow loom band attached to his wrist. Now that he was looking, Patton’s usual bright smile frayed a little around the edges and attached a little too tightly strung to his cheeks. 

Virgil knew the signs.

“Patton, what’s wrong?” he soothed as smoothly as possible.

Patton looked surprised at Virgil’s question, eyebrow quirking up fully. 

Virgil rolled his eyes. Really, did Patton really think he was that dumb? “Yes, something is bothering you. Spill.”

It took him a couple tries to form a sentence. 

“Uhh, I came to check if you were okay with me working with Roman this afternoon? He says that he needs some input about feelings for the next video. And I’m gonna give him emotional support!”

He and Patton  _ were _ going to spend some time in the imagination today, Roman having said that it was fine for them to go, an unusual occurrence. Virgil’s face dropped, he had rather been looking forward to that trip.

Patton caught Virgil’s look of disappointment, “I can cancel if you want to go! I don’t want you to be hanging out on your own!”

Was it selfish of him to want to say for Patton to cancel? But Patton had done so much for him! And he looked so excited about the upcoming video as well. So… he really couldn’t take that away from him.

“No, Pat. You go have fun creating! I’ll be fine on my own,” Virgil announced begrudgingly. “We can do the trip to the imagination another time.”

“Are you sure Kiddo? I don’t want to leave you alone! Logan’s staying here, maybe you could hang out with him!”

Him. On his own. With another side. Without Patton? No.

No, that didn’t sound like a good idea at all.

“No, no, Pat, it’s okay! It’s fine! It’s good being alone, really!”

Probably not the best thing to say to the man who is literally the definition of a cinnamon roll.

But, really? He was good with being alone! Why should he have to start being with people now? Crippling social anxiety, remember!

Virgil’s protests seemed to have landed on deaf ears because Logan was called and summoned into the living room. And even though his glasses were immaculate and hair styled perfectly, he looked miffed.

“Yes, Patton?”

Patton’s smile morphed into one of a giddy schoolgirl, “Hey Lo! Is Virge able to keep you company as you work on your organising stuff? I just don’t want him to be alone! It’d be so sad!”

Logan looked torn as he pushed his glasses up to the bridge of his nose in contemplation, glancing at the moral side. One look at Patton’s smiling face seemed to sway his judgement. Someone huffed but he couldn’t tell if it came from him or Logan.

As much as Virgil would hate to admit it, Logan’s crumbling resolve due to the shine of Patton’s eyes was, dare he say it,  _ cute _ .

Patton must be rubbing off on him. He was going soft.

“I suppose that would be adequate. I have a few issues in which I must address, Virgil could sit as I attend to these matters if he wishes.”

Patton’s face split open into a grin at seeing his ‘child’ making new friends.

“Great! You kids have fun!”

With a satisfying whoosh noise, Patton disappeared just as quickly as Logan came.

“I really have to get him to stop calling everyone that, it’s super lame,” grumbled Virgil, glimpsing at Logan taking out his laptop.

“It is baffling,” Logan agreed, turning to his work. 

It didn’t seem like Logan wanted to socially interact - a fact that was completely fine with him! - but sitting here meant that he wasn’t able to get stuff. His headphones and sketchbook were in his room still and he wasn’t about to go get them for fear of being rude of scolded or looked at in confusion or laughed at and- 

Yeah, he just wasn’t gonna do that.

Instead, his eyes focused on light.

The light glistening on Logan’s glasses reflected slightly, bouncing off around the walls of the Mind Palace. Virgil stood staring at the action of light for a few moments before deciding that he was being creepy and sat down on the tabletop. He became very interested in his chipping fingernails.

Virgil opted to stay silent, it was clear that Logan wanted to focus on work rather than speaking to him. Not that he was surprised. The other sides, apart from Patton, a literal angel, usually wanted nothing to do with him. So he kept focused on the strangely mesmerising pattern on the wall from Logan’s glasses warping with white and blue blurs of light. 

Aside from being calming, it seemed to remind him of Thomas’ childhood.

A time where he was a little more carefree. A time when everything made a little more sense.

He concentrated on the ever-changing shapes and the thrum of the headache that had blown around his tornado of worries dulled.

Logan cleared his throat loudly. 

It might have been half an hour that he had been staring creepily at Logan. He didn’t really keep track of time.

All he really thought was, huh, they must have finished the non-talking stage of the awkwardness. 

“Virgil,” Logan adjusted his glasses with precise purpose. “I would like your opinion on an idea of mine.”

“My opinion?” 

Logan never asked for opinions, they were, as he dubbed, a waste of time when ‘a superior idea came to light’. And why was his opinion needed? Surely he was the last person Logan would ask. Patton maybe if the situation needed an outlook on feelings or even annoying Roman with his alignment of Thomas’ hopes and dreams.

But Anxiety? That didn’t sound good at all.

“Okay, Logic. Wadda ya need?”

“Thomas needs to expand his knowledge and brain.”

He can’t be suggesting… no… hadn’t they talked about this?

Virgil huffed and slinked further into his oversized hoodie. ”Yeah, not that I'm disagreeing, if he was a little smarter I wouldn't worry twice as much as I do now, but… what…?”

Logic sighed and methodically fiddled with his black frames. 

”I am proposing Thomas go back to university to take a degree.”

His hands started to quiver incessantly but Virgil couldn’t care less about that at the moment. Only Logan seemed to stay calm.

”A degree? Like, University degree? That degree?”

He could not be serious, no, this had to be some sort of sick joke. He really shouldn’t flip out about the mere  _ idea _ of something- he was already starting to- but if Anxiety was this worried about it, shouldn’t that give out  _ some _ indication? Surely Logan, the embodiment of  _ Logic _ , could figure that one out.

“Yes.”

Virgil couldn’t remember a more stressful time in his life. It was the only time that grades had truly mattered. Could have an impact on the future. The grades he didn’t end up using to service him in any way at all. 

He was not going back. He could not replay the stress of assignments and exams and friends and peer pressure and parties and social gatherings and unforgiving scorning that amounted to nothing…

“Virgil?” Logan’s voice sounded far away.

… and balancing home life and now this entire youtube platform and social media and the lack of sleep that was ten times worse than what he got after finishing a video and…

“No!” His shout seemed to ring around the room. A thousand tiny fractals of light pierced around the room as Logan, finally, looked up from his work. 

“But-” Logan tried.

“No, we are not doing that degree thing, we are not going back to university, we are not reliving whatever fresh hell that was. We experienced it, we didn’t like it. Let’s move on.”

Logan looked at him again, perplexed. 

“Virgil, I do believe this is the proper solution. The problem is that Thomas has not expanded his knowledge of the universe in the way that is desired by society since completing his degree. Therefore, the logical way to proceed is taking yet another.”

Virgil groaned, he was not doing that again, “Logic, I  _ appreciate _ your concern for Thomas but let’s leave the worrying about the future to me, kay? Thomas has so many things that he is doing right now, his youtube platform is taking off, millions of people are watching his videos, it would only take  _ one _ slip up to ruin everything that we have all been working towards for the past couple years, destroying his whole career! Then everyone would hate him and everyone would-”

“Which is why-” Logan had interrupted sternly with a nervous and frustrated tug of his tie- “Maybe that’s why Thomas needs a more stable job, something that isn’t so risky to pursue. People fall out of public favour instantaneously, Thomas needs something to set him up for life!”

“What Thomas  _ needs _ is a job  _ now _ . He needs a stable lifestyle that isn’t full of running around and the stress of doing well or the scorn of professionals or wasting time on fucking useless assignments!”

”He wouldn’t be wasting time on, as you quote, ‘fucking useless assignments’. He would be expanding his brain!”

“Well,  _ maybe _ he should be focusing on the things that are going not-horribly in his life rather than setting up for disaster!”

“You would think that the anxious one would have a positive opinion on creating a stable life for himself. Clearly, I had thought wrong for once in my existence.”

“ _ Clearly _ , you were wrong about something! Wasn’t me though! Plus, you’ve been known to make mistakes before.”

“You make  _ one _ mistake- !”

“Face it, you’re just grumpy because Thomas is making a living out of  _ art _ !”

“Preposterous! I’m just saying that Thomas should be able to take something else on! A degree would be an accommodating change!”

“Thomas doesn’t need that right now!” Virgil argued, throat raw. “He is already stressed enough!”

“Yes! He is stressed! But that is not my issue!” Logan roared, face contorted, and red with effort. “It is yours Anxiety!  _ You _ made him feel that way! It is  _ your fault _ !”

_ Your fault... _

Silence was heavy at the darkest times. The way people seem to freeze at the deafening sound of a gunshot. The way that the world stays frozen when you’re drowning.

It was the feeling of being lost under a blindfold, scraping at the edges but not being able to get it off. The feeling of suffocating under blankets and pillows and feeling that coursing through every cell in your body.

Silence.

Deafening, unbearable, stifling silence.

_ It’s your fault, yours Anxiety, you made him feel this way, your fault, yourfault yourfault yourfaultyourfault... _

Maybe he was the cause of everything that went wrong. He made Thomas miserable, stressed, depressed, he could bring nothing positive to his life. Maybe it would be better if he just moved far away, locking the doors to the light sides behind him. 

_ Your fault. _

A tear crystalised on his cheek, swirling with black and trailing quietly down.

And he just sat there, silent, motionless, rivers of sorrow flowing down his face.

His vision reduced to a blur of colour and light to overwhelming to comprehend. 

It would be better for everyone if he steered clear of the others. 

Better for everyone if he just disappeared. And this time it wasn’t just his overactive imagination thinking, Logan had said it. And coming from the logical side just made everything so much more unbearable.

There was colour. Light. And Anxiety couldn’t think without wanting to punch someone or curl up into a ball and stay there forever.

He had broken again, shards of fear shattering his soul. Only this time, in front of Logan.

He was stupid. Stupid and he didn’t know what he was doing. Didn’t know what he had done. 

Useless.

A black shape approached him, scary and vast. The black shape was going to touch him. 

“Don’t!”

The voices in his head projected, reverberating louder than ever before, like a sick, melodious moan.

The black blob trailed further away from his line of vision, almost a looming shadow in the distance. 

“ _ Virgil? Virgil? _ ” Something grabbed his hand. It was clammy, the overwhelming stigma of senses. It helped ground him to reality. “ _ Can you squeeze my hand if you hear me _ .” 

Why was everything underwater? Drowning. Sinking. He couldn't hear properly.

The thrum of a voice continued to calm him. He tried to squeeze back, pouring all his energy into the simple movement. 

“Good. Now Virgil, can you take some deep breaths for me?”

He felt the pressure of an object on his hand, vibrating through his bones, it started to move.

The rhythm was calming, he tried to concentrate on the hum. 

“In for 4...” The clouds in his head started to clear. “Hold for 7… out for 8…”

He repeated what the voice told him, he didn’t have enough strength to think anyway.

“Keep going… out for 8… well done...you’re doing great...”

It took him at least 30 rounds for him to peel his eyes open. 

Light shined in his eyes, magnifying his already massive headache.

Virgil looked up.

He was on the floor- how did he get on the floor? There was a mystery to most of the things that he did, so that wasn’t the most surprising thing that resulted.

The surprising thing, however, was the image of Logan, knelt on the floor next to him with the most gentle face he had seen the logical side possess. His expression looked almost like butter; soft and warm. And he was staring down at him with eyes that seemed to read his thoughts and into his soul.

Logan cleared his throat quietly. 

He looked guilty. He shouldn’t be guilty. He was the person who was crazy, not Logan!

Nevertheless, Logan searched for an appropriate expression to display his weakness.

“I apologise for my behaviour,” he started, looking down at him. “I should have waited and not pushed you to be uncomfortable with the decision.”

Virgil mumbled.

“Pardon?” No one could hear what he was saying. Maybe it was best off that no one listened to him.

He managed to bite out the remark again.

“It wasn’t your fault...” Virgil spoke with a resigned tone, sighing angrily and carting a hand through his hair. “I flipped out over something that wasn’t a big deal. I should be stronger than that. I don't know why I can't deal...”

“No, you shouldn’t have had to deal with that!” Logan’s expression twisted into a grimace as Virgil flinched. “Sorry… But- you shouldn’t be obligated to deal just because everyone else is.”

“That just means I’m pathetic,” Virgil scoffed. For the smart side, he clearly didn't get the idea of someone being weak.

Logan put his hands back on his shoulders. “No. It means that you are strong. You keep trying and trying and pushing and fighting with your own thoughts to keep Thomas happy and it’s because of you that… Thomas is Thomas. You have to fight this every day and yet, you are still helping… and fighting and keeping Thomas happy. 

“And that makes you stronger than anyone else.”

His calculating eyes bore into Virgil’s.

“Stronger than you?” he tried in an attempt to be snarky, failing as he choked back a sob and his voice went hoarse.

Logic chuckled and glanced warmly at him. He squeezed his shoulder. 

“Yes, stronger than me.”

Virgil looked up 

“I just-” Virgil paused, “I don’t understand how you deal so well with all of the stress and the pressure and deadlines that pile up. How do you keep sane and act so… I dunno… maturely?”

“You think that I ‘deal’ with all of the responsibility? You’re the one that gives me reason to keep going. I’m just the one that makes sure everything is in order. You just need to work on asking for help, making sure you don’t stress too much. You think I don’t get stressed?”

Logan smiled without restraint.

”As much as I learnt this the wrong way- hell, I'm still learning- it's fine to ask for help. We all care about you, even if we haven't done the greatest job showing it as of late.”

It was still his fault though, Logic helping him didn't change that! Even he had said so!

”But- Logan, you said… It's still my fault. I'm just… Holding Thomas back. All because of-”

He couldn’t continue. 

”You can’t help that!” Logan shouted, quietening when Virgil flinched. ”You are the way you are. There are preventative approaches to make sure that you don’t feel all of this to the extreme that you do but… you are the way that you are. And the best thing to do is accept it and try to help it. We have started accepting you Anxiety- Virgil- and if you would let us, we can try and help in any way we know how.”

He was too overcome with emotion to do anything but sit there, dumbfounded by everything that the logical side had just said. 

He broke down and Logan was there to hold him.

  
  
  
  


Logan honestly didn’t know how he got here, this had to be one of the least likely situations that could have occurred. Ever. Like, a 0.33% chance. The anxious side had thrown himself into his arms, and it was-

He had to admit, this was really nice.

“Do you want to know some facts about bees?” The words were delivered with a tone as sweet as honey. Logan didn’t even know where the idea came from. Or why he hadn’t thought about it before. There were countless research papers declaring that listening to a person talk about something mediocre helped to ground an anxious individual. Not that bees were ever mediocre!

Maybe it was the wrong thing, he could just keep silent.

A hesitant nod pressed into his shoulder.

“Did you know, Virgil, that bees must gather nectar from two million flowers to make a pound of honey. An individual bee would only make less than 1/12th of that in a lifetime. The honey bee is extremely hard-working, somewhat like yourself.”

Virgil lifted his head up and struck Logan with a stare saltier than Draco Malfoy eating a bag of chips.

“That’s shit and you know it.”

“If you say so,” smirked Logan and Virgil's face disappeared again. “Bees also dance to communicate in some situations...”

Virgil started to melt in his arms. 

And Logan would never let go.

They stayed like that until they were interrupted by a high pitched scream emitting from Patton and Roman. 

  
  


**_Outcome: Subject will listen and return to a state of stability when cognitive distortions have been talked through and rendered improbable._ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahh! Hope y'all are doing well! Here's something.   
> *throws an update*   
> I love the idea of Logic liking bees and I've recently watched The Bee Movie so I hope you enjoyed.  
> Stay safe and sane!


	3. The Fanciful Method

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Settle the Emo-Nightmare with distraction and deterrence, calming and resolving the situation after.

**_Settle the Emo-Nightmare with distraction and deterrence, calming and resolving the situation after._ **

Roman had been busy.

Thomas was working on his musical and, although the creative trait loved everything about the production process, Roman had declared loudly that Tech Week could go and die in a hole. Shut-in his room for basically the whole month, he was consistently running off of everything except clinical drugs. Virgil had been in that state before and he had to admit there was something wrong.

In his experience, running oneself into the ground never seemed to make anything more productive. There was going to be a breaking point. Virgil just needed to make sure that breaking point happened after everything was done.

When Patton came to breakfast that morning, Virgil being already awake with an obscene amount of coffee, he looked mildly worried.

“Roman’s locked himself in his room again, he says he’s already had breakfast but I didn’t… Have you seen Roman come out?” Patton bit his lip in concern as he asked.

“I haven’t seen him come out here and I’ve been up since 5. If he came out, it would have had to be the early hours of the morning,” Virgil replied, confused. Why would anyone want to get up that early? Even he wanted to sleep for most of the day, worries just made it difficult. “Don’t worry about it Pat, I’m sure it’s fine.”

It was fine, the anxious side kept telling himself, there was bound to be a bump in the production. This was just a blip in the journey to success. It was going to be fine, everything was going to go as planned, the show would be amazing and when Thomas stopped all of these performances, Virgil was going to have a long nap because being optimistic was tiring. 

The day passed quickly. Thomas being stressed about production for the majority of the day left Virgil with a glaring headache. By the time that dinner came, he still hadn’t seen any sign of Roman.

“I asked him if he would come down for dinner, he just said he would take a break when he was finished,” Logan recounted as they ate that night. “I admire his work ethic but that counterproductive attitude is what I would classify as… stupid.”

It was then that Virgil started to become concerned.

Normally, he would relish in the time that the fanciful side and himself spent apart. There were never any major arguments throughout that month, excluding the ‘Logan Insanity Fiasco’ as they had dubbed it, and Virgil could sit in his room for hours without a singular disturbance of Roman barging in and demanding attention. However, quite unfortunately due to the approaching set up of the show and Thomas packing for the upcoming tour, Virgil was experiencing way more stress than his usual worrying about nothing routine. 

This also meant that in the last few days before they left, he came up with the most disturbingly rational decision to oversee Roman’s progress for the musical. Considering he would rather perform a public speech than associate with Roman on any given day, Virgil had found this decision to be weirdly mature. 

Bracing himself to deal with Roman, Virgil made the difficult and treacherous walk to the dramatic trait’s room.

As he arrived at the door of the creative side’s room, he wasn’t surprised to see that the unbelievably extra Roman had decorated his door with a giant star, imitating a celebrities dressing room. Rolling his eyes, he rudely opened the door and stepped into the room.

Honestly, he didn’t think it counted as a room anymore, it looked more like the inside of a recycling bin. 

The waste paper basket was overflowing with tragically lost ideas that Virgil had heard about every morning at breakfast up until his disappearance, paper was plastered all over the wall with majestic, scribbling lines for stage directions, music scores, scripts and costume ideas, and clearly there was an over the top victory speech, consisting of ten pages, sitting on the thing that used to resemble a desk.

In the middle of the mess, a dishevelled Roman sat in a state Virgil had never seen him in. Messy. His usually perfect hair looked like it had been ‘artfully’ styled by an electric eel and his eyes were that of a racoon. The Prince Roman was  _ drooling.  _ On the floor. Asleep. 

It looked like the breaking point had happened long ago.

Too good of an opportunity to miss, Virgil pulled out his phone and snapped a few pictures and an uncharacteristic selfie because, well, he didn’t see Roman in this state every day.

“Ughhhh…” 

Virgil had to stifle a giggle.

“Who dares enter my room?” A bleary-eyed Roman woke up, swotting the air around his head for possible prey. 

“Gee Princey, you look like you’ve been beaten with a stick,” Virgil remarked back bluntly, accompanied by a smirk. 

Upon hearing his monotone voice, Roman bolted up into a standing position, trying to regain his dignity. 

“Well, if it isn’t the famous Rachel Bay- _ Moans _ . Care to explain your venture to my kingdom?”

“First of all, thank you. You gave me such a great opening act.” Roman went beet red, but said nothing. “My journey to your so-called ‘mystical kingdom’ was to check on your progress. I don’t want to be here, you don’t want me here, so let’s make this quick.”

“Fiiinnnnne,” Roman retorted with a huff. He raised a hand and gestured loosely around the room. “This is my progress. Be careful not to scuff your cloven hooves against my floor on your way out.”

Virgil snorted, talking to Roman was always pleasant, “Calling me the devil? Real original.”

“No, I’m calling you a goat, you goat.”

He ignored Roman’s extremely childish meltdown, “So what have you actually done? Final scores for backing music? The script changes? Finalising the props and set? Sound effects? Have you got anything that’s finished to take with us on Monday?”

He was waiting for Roman to tell him to shove off, for him to say ‘I have this under control so stick your nosy nose somewhere else emo nightmare’. To be mildly agitated by his hostile attitude but overall reassured that everything was as it should be. 

Roman did none of these things. Instead, he slumped back onto the ground, head in his hands. 

“Princey.” Virgil was mildly worried now. “Tell me you’ve finished everything. That everything will be ready to go.”

Roman whimpered a bit before peering back at Virgil and replying in a significantly quieter voice, “I may have run into a small issue. I’m completely blocked! Everything that I think of is… ugh. I can’t do anything productive. I’ve been in this position for days.”

Virgil just stared, “You mean as in, like, the final script changes just need tweaking, don’t you? Or is it the costumes, I’m pissed off but I can help with the costumes.”

“No, I haven’t-”

“I’ll bet Logan will look over your music changes, he had some sort of weird fascination with music, something about the patterns.”

Roman cringed again, somehow becoming even smaller.

“Nothing.”

What?

“I’ve done nothing.”

Virgil’s response included some words that would never be used in front of Patton.

“So nothing is ready?” he finally concluded.

“Well, not really but, technically, yes…”

It was with Roman’s words that Virgil’s precious sanity and patience started to crumble.

What was Thomas going to do when all of the cast asked for the final changes? Oh God,  _ nothing _ was ready. Thomas wasn’t going to be able to do anything. 

Fine, this was their bump.

“So you thought,” Virgil increasing volume with every syllable, “that you could sit here, trying to come up with ideas to fix the stupid mistakes you’ve made, by yourself, three days before production?!”

“Virgil-”

“Are you fucking _ kidding me?!  _ Do you have any idea what will happen if we don’t get this show out on time? We will be  _ humiliated _ ! We have people who want to see the stuff you are working on, people who are helping perform the things that we produce. Everyone will be looking at Thomas.”

“I tried to finish it all but...”

“Did it never occur to you to ask for help? We could have helped you concentrate on finishing! Your massive ego the size of the moon couldn’t take that could it?! You needed help!”

Roman looked embarrassed, somewhat tearful and angry at the same time.

“I may not be great at finishing things, but at least I am sure that I will eventually create something of high quality! You, sir, are a bitch! Try to have just a little civility.”

“I’m perfectly fucking civil!” spat Virgil. 

Roman looked doubtful at him and then back to the floor.

“Do you not care that we are going to let people down?” Virgil stressed, tearing a hand through his purple bangs. “The audience wants something of high standard, not some type of Frozen musical production!”

“Don’t you  _ dare _ diss ‘Frozen’ the musical! From the musical numbers to the set design, that Broadway production was incredible!”

“Princey-!”

“How is anxiety, of all things, going to help me finish this creative masterpiece!”

“I would have at least helped to push you into doing work. You’ve got nothing!”

What was going to happen? Thomas was going to be up on stage in three days! He would be performing in front of crowds with high expectations and nothing was finished. And there was nothing he could do without Roman. 

“Virgil, just face it, I’m not finishing this in time. We can cancel the first two performances, I’ll have this perfect by then I promise.”

“We can’t just cancel stuff! Thomas will have to go out there and do the show!”

He’ll get laughed off, he’ll be a joke.

He’ll forget the new changes they went through at rehearsal and make everyone else slip up. The audience will be disappointed, he’ll let everyone down. Thomas will just stand there.

He’ll stuff things up. Anxiety always does. 

Virgil sank down on the paper littered floor next to Roman. Two black teardrops appeared on the nearest scribbled note page. 

They’ll be disappointed. They’re all counting on Thomas. He’ll make a fool out of Thomas. He’ll freeze. No one will like him. They won’t finish on time.

“Anxiety?” Roman’s concerned voice was drowned out by all of the worries.

They’ll all hate him. They already do. How could they not?

“Virg..., li...st... to me, every...ing will...e fine.” Warbly words filtered through, nothing enough for him to comprehend.

His chest seized up and he willed himself to breathe.

Virgil snapped back to reality when a gentle arm guided him to a warm body.

“Are you ok? How do you feel?” His words seemed to breathe in and out of his ears.

It took a few shuddering moments to answer. “I feel like I am- I’m about to be stabbed in the back and there isn’t- anything I can do-” Virgil whimpered, inhaling sharply again. Out… In… Just concentrate on breathing…

“Well- uhh… I guess that’s not good...” 

“No shit Princey,” Virgil bit out sarcastically.

He was out in the cold again.

The nerve of him, Roman just got up and left!

Not that Virgil really cared, not that Virgil gave a shit what Roman did and definitely not that it hurt that he just went away.

Who was he kidding?

Shivering on one's own is never as good as being held by someone else.

He heard a click. Roman reappeared with bundles of blankets in hand. 

Silently wrapping a fuzzy purple blanket around a shaky Virgil, he made a small clearing in the mound of paper and summoned a couch, guiding him to sit comfortably.

“So, do you want to tell me what ails you?” Roman asked.

Virgil looked incredulously at him, “Seriously? You don’t know?”

The Prince looked mildly guilty as he responded, “I feel as though I may have been partially to blame. However, you can’t have been freaking out over the finalising of the product. That kind of freak out is a two problem freak out.”

Virgil sighed and brought a shaking hand up to massage his new blooming headache, “If you don’t finish all of this, we don’t get as much time to practise. If we don’t get as much time to practise, I don’t feel confident that we can perform it. And if I don’t feel confident-”

“-You feel like you will mess it up and ruin everything, you become heightened and not able to ease up, resulting in anxieties taking over the whole performance,” Roman finished for him.

Looking at Virgil’s still slightly surprised reaction, Roman remarked, “Yes, I can read your mind. Get over it.”

More scared looks. 

“Relax Peter  _ Panic _ . I’m joking!”

“Seriously, how did you know?”

Roman shrugged, “Honestly? I have the same pressures pile up on me. If I don’t have something good, the entire project is a bust. If I don’t keep coming up with good content, the income lowers. Thomas’ whole life depends on me coming up with amazing ideas.”

Virgil leaned in slowly until his head was pressed into Roman’s shoulder. “Shit. Roman, I had no idea. God, that must be awful,” he whispered.

“Don’t sweat it. I love what I do, I wouldn’t give it up for anything.”

Having no viable response, Virgil continued to be silent, listening to their breathing patterns.

“Do you know what I do when I get overwhelmed with all the things that I do?” Roman said after a while, delicately resting his head on top of Virgil’s.

“What?” he responded in barely a whisper.

“I tend to tell stories of faraway lands and kingdoms. The places where my problems don’t matter, where I can be whoever I want to be.”

“That’s beautiful.”

“That’s creativity.”

Snapping his fingers again, he lit the room with twinkling lights and dimmed the main chandelier to darkness.

“Do you want to hear any?”

“Please.”

Virgil closed his eyes as Roman’s words lulled him into another place.

“Once upon a time, there was a fair maiden who was to marry the most beautiful prince in the land. She lived wonderfully, in a castle full of servants and a beautiful forest to play in whenever her heart desired. There was only one problem. She was in love already. In love with a local village girl...”

  
  
  


Roman was having a hard time believing his eyes. The embodiment of something more sinister than Hades was curled up in a fluffy purple blanket and leaning against him in some sort of bliss. 

“... The fair maiden's brother had witnessed the return between these two and promised to keep the relationship a secret until she decided to share this news with her parents. With his dark demeanour and mysterious backstory, the only one who would seem adequate to be with him would be one Roman Prince!-”

Roman saw Virgil crack an eye open and stare up at him sarcastically.

“Really, Tinderfella?”

Roman laughed and nudged Virgil in an exaggerated fashion.

“You know, I think you’re just jealous that I could totally get an abundance of dates on tinder!”

Virgil just rolled his eyes. 

Roman continued. “Anyway, the brother declared that he would not speak of the romantic happenings between the fair maiden and her beloved...”

Nothing but him and Virgil in an illusory world, somewhere far away where nothing could harm them.

A world connected to theirs by nothing but their own imaginations.

**_Outcome: Subject calms and welcomes the distraction, later looking at the anxieties with a more rational outlook._ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahh! It is Roman's time to shine!  
> I had heaps of fun coming up with nicknames for this chapter.  
> Feel free to comment below, I don't bite!   
> Hope you enjoy!


	4. The famILY Method

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Make Virgil feel loved through cuddles and teddy bears.

**_Make Virgil feel loved through cuddles and teddy bears._ **

“I know you don’t like being rendered as cute and not serious Lo,” Patton cried cheerfully, “but you can look at it being a team-building exercise!” 

“Logan, we all think you're twice as smart as us, with or without a onesie,” Virgil reasoned.

Pushing his glasses further up the bridge of his nose Logan replied, “Correction, I _know_ I am twice as smart as all of you put together. I simply do not condone such frivolous activities.”

“C’mon kiddo! Pleeease?”

Taking one look at Patton’s hopeful face, Logan sighed dramatically and snapped his fingers, changing his clothes from a sharp shirt and tie to a fluffy unicorn onesie.

Virgil honestly hadn’t expected Logan to comply. He often thought that Patton’s superpower of melting everyone’s resolve was the most incredible thing that he had seen.

“Eeeiiiiiiiiiiiii! You look so cute Lo!” Patton smiled widely at Logans change in attire. 

Logan blushed at Patton’s scream, “Thank you, Patton, onesies _are_ extremely comfortable.”

Virgil had to hide a smirk at that exchange.

“Yay! We’re all matching now!” exclaimed Patton, pointing to his own cat-themed onesie, Roman’s new dragon onesie and Virgil’s panda onesie, gifted to him by Roman. 

“Indeed. Are we ready to start ‘Movie Night’?” asked Logan, glancing at Patton for the name confirmation.

Patton nodded proudly and looked over at Roman, “Alrighty! Roman, the great and mighty prince, what shall it be?”

Virgil smirked to himself as Roman wrestled his internal dilemma, “I can’t choose between my babies! They're all so perfect and wonderful!”

Patton turned to him, “How about it Virge? What will it be?”

“I haven’t seen Princess and the Frog in a while so we could watch that one I guess...”

“Wonderful choice!” Roman summoned a TV and DVD player into the room, preparing to put the chosen movie disc in.

“Wait! Hold on a second! I really want to give it to him! I’m not going to be able to wait for the whole movie!” Patton complained, looking at Logan and Roman for confirmation. Logan nodded and Roman dropped the DVD to come closer.

_Give what?_

“Your present of course!” Patton grinned childishly.

He hadn’t realised he spoke out loud.

“Can I give it to him?! Pretty please?!” Upon seeing Logan nod once more, albeit, this time trying to hold back a smile when Patton’s grin went impossibly wider.

“Ok, close your eyes!”

Scuffling and shuffling could be heard throughout the room. A squishy package was deposited into his outstretched hand, long fingers crinkling the wrapping paper. 

Virgil’s eyes fluttered open, staring dumbfounded at the purple paper package, embezzled with yellow stars and silver, intricate swirls that looked like it had been drawn on by Patton and Roman respectively. 

“Open it!” urged Patton.

Delicately, he pried the paper away, ensuring none of it ripped.

A teddy bear.

A black and furry teddy bear with purple gemstone eyes.

And they had made it for _him_.

“Sir Snuggles shall protect you from whatever attempts you harm!” Roman proclaimed with a flourish.

Logan shifted uncomfortably in his unusual apparel, pasting on a genuine soft smile, “We thought it might help you calm down after attacks, or keep you company when you just want to be on your own for a while.”

“Do you like it?” Patton’s hopeful voice sounded as he took a seat next to Logan.

He definitely did.

“Thanks, you guys,” he responded softly, taking care to grab everyone into a hug.

As he let go and observed the following scene of Roman and Logan playfully arguing as to what side of the DVD to put in, he realised.

He wasn’t fine. But that was okay. He had friends here who could help him, had people who wouldn’t judge him or shut him out for being afraid for the future.

He had Patton. Patton who would cuddle him until the broken pieces came together again. Patton who would give him hot chocolate and go outside to lay down on the sunny grass of the imagination. Patton who would include him with others so that he didn’t feel left out and always felt a little more loved. Patton who would be with him when he needed it the most.

He had Logan. Logan who would speak calmly and soundly and talk him through the anxieties and worries. Logan who would gently hold his hand and trace a path back to reality. Logan who would be patient and kind and guide him through breathing exercises and discuss theories and conspiracies with him until he would fall into a blissful slumber on the couch. Logan who could calm him down with rationality and objective facts.

And he had Roman. Roman, the creative, fanciful side who would never cease to come up with ideas to distract him after a long week. Roman who would be a source of banter for him to ease up. Roman who would constantly reenact different scenes from movies and sing just to see him smile. Roman who would curl up on the couch with him to binge Disney movies and fall asleep next to him to chase away nightmares.

And that was enough.

The lights dimmed as the movie started, ending flashes of colour through his eyes.

With Roman’s arm around his shoulders, securing him to his side. With Logan’s comforting hand in his. With Patton grinning happily at him from his seat. With the familiar melody of the current Disney movie chiming in the background, he curled into the couch happily, burying his face into the comforting fur of Sir Snuggles.

Being here, staring at brightly smiling faces, he knew he belonged. 

He was home.

And there was no one else he would rather be with.

__________________________________________________

**This is my Family. It is little and broken but still good.**

**\- Stitch**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you very much for reading my tiny self-indulgent fic!  
> Feel free to leave a comment! I don't bite!  
> You are all amazing! Stay safe!  
> Z

**Author's Note:**

> Hello to the Sanders Sides Fandom!  
> This is my debut (aka. the first Sanders Sides fanfic that I have attempted).  
> Never fear! I have completed all four parts so I know where this is going.
> 
> Shoutout to CaraIsTrash for making my mess into something that englishes good as well as icabyppup for all of her encouraging words! Your amazingness never ceases to amaze!


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